r/lotrmemes Jan 01 '23 Silver 1

Please tell me Other

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1.2k Upvotes

109 comments sorted by

368

u/hbi2k Jan 01 '23 edited Jan 01 '23

They're really just placeholders created because Saruman's throwaway line about "the rods of the five wizards" implies the existence of two more besides himself, Gandalf, and Radagast. Semi-canon sources name them Alatar and Pallando.

They went into the far East. Tolkien went back and forth on what became of them. Sometimes he said that they failed in their mission, either being turned to evil like Saruman or getting distracted like Radagast. Other times he'd say they succeeded, fomenting rebellions against Sauron in his own lands, and if it hadn't been for them, Sauron could have conquered everything east of the Sea years earlier.

Since Tolkien never definitively says whether they ever went home to Valinor or not, I like to think that they're still here, just kind of hanging out and doing good works. Fred Rogers was probably one of them in disguise.

122

u/Nametheft Jan 01 '23

Tolkien presented a theory that their distraction was to teach humans magic. Thus creating a possible middle earth with (less powerful) "wizards" still around.

18

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '23

Now, that is interesting

16

u/Nametheft Jan 02 '23 edited Jan 02 '23

Yes. As one of them you really should remember the truth, though.

19

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '23

Too much pipe weed 🤷‍♂️

1

u/Streen012 Jan 02 '23

Only problem is they have to get hit with the spell and survive it to learn it with an 18% effective learning attribute. /s

35

u/themitchster300 Jan 02 '23

I've never heard this before, any idea where I could read more about this?

9

u/Nametheft Jan 02 '23

In Unfinished Tales (of Númenor and Middle-earth) among other places.

37

u/SeptimusShadowking Jan 02 '23

Ah, so that's how Hogwarts came to be.

3

u/prolegend144 Jan 02 '23

Highly underrated comment

53

u/benzman98 Jan 01 '23 edited Jan 01 '23

I like how in some of the versions their “success” is an indirect success. They go to the East and set up their own magical cults which end up harming Sauron’s ability to procure his own followers. So they do thwart Sauron and therefor succeed in their mission but not through some morally righteous act of pure good/ devotion to the Valar.

4

u/slynik Jan 02 '23

You could make a religion out of this.

2

u/Melodic_monke Jan 02 '23

Oh damn thank you.

293

u/IPutThisUsernameHere Jan 01 '23 edited Jan 02 '23

One of them is Usidore, wizard of the 12th realm of Ephysies, Master of light and shadow, manipulator of magical delights, devourer of chaos.

Edit: and Champion of the Great Halls of Terraquis.

365

u/Spronkel Jan 01 '23

The other is Frank, he's just tagging along because their outfits coincidentally matched

175

u/WookieeCookiees02 Jan 01 '23

And the third one? Well, there are some who call him… Tim

62

u/Spronkel Jan 01 '23

20

u/rosepetal72 Jan 02 '23

At least we know his favorite color.

19

u/popanator3000 Jan 02 '23

blue

Edit: no wait, Yellow!!!!

24

u/History_Man_Lando Ringwraith Jan 01 '23

He will try to warn people about a very dangerous mammal

25

u/lkyte123 Ringwraith Jan 02 '23

7

u/Pitiful_Tonight_4185 Jan 02 '23

The other is Merlín, he's a yellow guy and can be found in dungeon 3 of the first land in Bit Heroes

1

u/TwinHavenUK GANDALF Jan 02 '23

Gauntlet?!

2

u/Pitiful_Tonight_4185 Jan 02 '23

No, game called Bit Heroes, top down 2D pixel game

25

u/Bugsbunny396 Jan 01 '23

The elves know him as fien yellac?

10

u/Croissant-Laser Jan 01 '23

Fangy Yelly!

20

u/CaptainKyleGames Balrog Jan 01 '23

Is the other one Spintax the Green, Master of the Third, Ninth, and Twelfth Realms of Ephysiyies, Wielder of Arcane Forces Compelling the Living and the Dead, Diviner of Unknowable Truths, Caster of Illusions, Destroyer of Lies, Dissolver of the Wall of Fire, Imbiber of the Nine Deadly Poisons, Author of the Pandenomicon, and Winner of the Wizard's Choice Award; the Dwarfs know me as Nickelback Silverchair, the Angels know me as Mama Cassai'el, the Vampires know me as Cameron Orlando, in the South I am known as Lodestone Greatcraft?

14

u/Themicroscoop Jan 01 '23

Zonananhoogstanges?

13

u/Croissant-Laser Jan 01 '23

Hoobastank!

14

u/Responsible_Buy9325 Jan 01 '23

This is a Burger King

8

u/Melodic_monke Jan 01 '23

Had to add "fr" into the title

2

u/Kultaren Jan 02 '23

I’m so shocked and giddy to find a HFTMT reference in this sub…

43

u/thekingofelvs Jan 01 '23

I like to think that they succeeded, going to the easterlings stirring up rebellion and preventing their full might from descending upon the west

34

u/sudo_rm_rf_star Dúnedain Jan 01 '23

Altar and Pallando

They went to the east and south. Not much is known about them and they likely failed in their tasks like all the istari except Gandalf

19

u/gandalf-bot Jan 01 '23

Look to my coming, at first light, on the fifth day. At dawn, look to the East.

4

u/CreamOfPotatoSoup1 Jan 02 '23

They’re coming back

2

u/Bluedino_1989 Jan 02 '23

How did Radagast fail?

3

u/sudo_rm_rf_star Dúnedain Jan 02 '23

He became distracted by the plants and animals of middle earth instead of focusing on his greater purpose. To the point where he became neglectful of the people's of middle earth

4

u/Bluedino_1989 Jan 02 '23

I can relate to that

1

u/Chicken_Commando Jan 02 '23

They were also romestamo and morinehtar, east helper and darkness slayer respectively so they were helpful

20

u/dimesinger Jan 01 '23

I really enjoyed Nerd of the Rings’ video on this topic.

7

u/Zenketski_2 Jan 02 '23

They're blue da ba di da ba dai

4

u/Pitiful_Tonight_4185 Jan 02 '23

One is purple like Barney the dino dude

10

u/weirdgroovynerd Jan 01 '23

They are the famous cuisine masters of lore, best known for their creation on the:

Blue Waffles

9

u/ReadItProper Jan 01 '23

Risky click if I ever saw one.

Edit: felt adventurous today so I clicked it. Was not disappointed.

7

u/16sardim Jan 02 '23

There were two of them. Eragon and Alfanso

5

u/Thunderzboltz Where are the Blue wizards? Jan 02 '23

They are the Aes Sedai of the Blue Ajah

40

u/EgoSenatus Jan 01 '23

To think, Amazon could’ve done something with these two instead of making that dredge of a tv show they claim people are racist for not liking.

19

u/wolv3 Jan 01 '23

Some think the wizard is a blue wizard

1

u/Mortiis07 Jan 02 '23

I hate it when people make dumb comments like this. I didn't like the show and have never been called racist, if that's at the forefront of your mind it must be for a reason

0

u/EgoSenatus Jan 02 '23

Articles like this paint the people who disliked the show as racist trolls. It makes no effort to talk about what was actually said, besides a vague quote from Elon Musk, which isn’t even cited. It only concerns itself with applauding people for fighting a straw man racism, and as a result of the poor journalism and the poor (or cleaver depending on how you look at it) response from Amazon, many look to people who didn’t care for the show and see racism.

I’m sure somewhere out there in the void there are some racist LOTR fans that hate the show for having a black woman in it, but the news and Amazon make no effort in differentiating between those people (or even proving they exist) and the people that dislike the show due to its slipshod writing, poor acting, and the fact that it seems like the show runners maybe only read the cliff notes for Lord of the Rings.

5

u/Mortiis07 Jan 02 '23

Erm yeah, that article is about calling out the people who made racist comments about the cast. Why would you have a problem with racists being opposed?

1

u/EgoSenatus Jan 02 '23

Because it’s done so very poorly and on a mass scale, meaning that actual criticism of the show fell on deaf ears at Amazon.

3

u/TorontoDavid Jan 02 '23

The story is about the reponse to racism. Everyone can and should call out racism, regardless if they enjoy the show or not.

0

u/EgoSenatus Jan 02 '23

I’m not saying people shouldn’t, but the way in which it was done is sloppy and counterproductive. I know highschoolers that wrote more astute articles.

1

u/TorontoDavid Jan 02 '23

Even if it’s sloppy - it still captures the reality of racism and its response. That’s the key point - there was racism.

0

u/EgoSenatus Jan 02 '23

Where? Where was the racism? I want a citation to specific instances. This pathetic excuse for journalism they’re doing is akin to putting out a kitchen fire with water- it doesn’t do anything besides maybe making the fire worse.

1

u/TorontoDavid Jan 02 '23

Do you want NBC to link to specific words/phrases?

The LotR cast sent a message in response to the racism.

The article gave summaries of the racism that precipitated the solidarity.

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1

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '23

[deleted]

3

u/EgoSenatus Jan 02 '23

Exactly. I would’ve loved to see a show about eastern or southern middle earth. Amazon wanted “creative liberty” and those two regions of the world were much more diverse than the west and Tolkien only mentions them in passing, meaning they could almost do whatever they wanted with them, but for some reason they chose to focus on the region of middle earth that Tolkien spent a large majority of his time describing, and then seemingly half ignore that description.

3

u/adidas_stalin Jan 02 '23

Wizards…..but blue

3

u/Pitiful_Tonight_4185 Jan 02 '23

Those are he 2 ruzes Gandalf mentions when Bilbo asks who is in the order of the wizards, though Gandalf forgot their names. So go look their names up

3

u/gandalf-bot Jan 02 '23

I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it's very difficult to find anyone.

0

u/Pitiful_Tonight_4185 Jan 02 '23

Can't, I'm trying to complete my current 8 quests plus 7 miscallensous quests, Unless the rewards are gear and gold(Skyrim moment)

2

u/bilbo_bot Jan 02 '23

Not Gandalf, the wandering wizard, who made such excellent fireworks! Old Took used to have them on Mid-Summer's Eve!

1

u/gandalf-bot Jan 02 '23

Meriadoc Brandybuck and Peregrin Took! I might have known!

3

u/pickles3810 Jan 02 '23

From the last year of this sub I have come to learn there are no wizards only grond

2

u/aerospikesRcoolBut Jan 02 '23

They’re just Gandalf the whole time

3

u/gandalf-bot Jan 02 '23

A wizard is never late, aerospikesRcoolBut. Nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.

0

u/wargasm40k Jan 02 '23

Nah, they were Alpharius and Omegon the whole time.

2

u/CorporealLifeForm Jan 02 '23

They have a similar role to Sir Not-appearing-in-this-film

1

u/Melodic_monke Jan 02 '23

Now I demand an explanation why they are blue!

1

u/Former_Ad4027 Jan 02 '23

I believe they used the multi verse one ended up becoming a teacher for young wizards Dumbledore i believe his name was the other helped a young king named Arthur and his name is said to have been Merlin The travels of the Blue Wizards would be epic

0

u/KazPrime Jan 02 '23

Did someone say original series about the Blue Wizards????

-23

u/ajsayshello- Jan 01 '23 edited Jan 01 '23

Dude a Google search would have taken so much less time than making a meme haha

-1

u/Maultaschtyrann Jan 02 '23

What you meant to say when using this template:

I don't know who blue wizards are, and at this point I am too afraid to ask.

Know your memes.

1

u/Melodic_monke Jan 02 '23

I do. But think for moment, if everybody used it like you said, why would we need bottom text there?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 01 '23

https://youtu.be/I7mdWnAjL3g an explanation on the 5 wizards of lotr.

These guys and 'indeepgeek' are so good at explaining the backstory to LOTR. Really worth your time if your interested.

1

u/sir_bonesalot Jan 02 '23

You and me both kid

1

u/[deleted] Jan 02 '23

Nothing special. We just be keeping the darkness at bay by smoking that pipe weed.

1

u/AspectofSlaps Jan 02 '23

Iirc they are allegories to fans' blue balls from withheld lore

1

u/the_lBear Jan 02 '23

No one knows darling, they're a mystery

1

u/Hagrid1994 Jan 02 '23

Alatar and Polando.

1

u/Maskmarvel Jan 02 '23

I believe they went East to fight Sauron or got distracted. They have cool cloak colors if your favorite color is blue.

2

u/sauron-bot Jan 02 '23

Orcs of Bauglir! Do not bend your brows!

1

u/Lord-Grocock Aragorn Jan 02 '23

Always two there are, no less, no more

1

u/TheBlueWizardo Jan 02 '23

Some mysteries are better left folded.

1

u/rumble00998 Jan 02 '23

He saw adventure time?

1

u/Balrog069 Jan 02 '23

So would the rest of us, but it's not for us to know.

For shits and giggles however, just think of them as the CIA in the middle east. Accurate enough.

1

u/YouRWho Jan 02 '23

The only thing that I heard about the blue wizards is that they're twins and they're both addicted to opium